The Chantastic Blog

Going into the weekend, I had plans to go out on Friday and Sunday while Saturday would be focused on work. This was a solid plan until my buddy Stephe asked if I wanted to go out on Saturday.

My buddy Stephe used to be an accountant for a large accounting firm and now works for a major bank. I currently do not have a post-graduation job lined up. Stephe said he was going to a bar with some other people. One of the ways I talked myself into going out on Saturday - despite going out on Friday and plans for Sunday - was that meeting Stephe’s friends could be a way to network, possibly leading to a job. I am dead serious when I say that this was one of the ways I justified going out on Saturday night.

So I went out and met Stephe’s friends. I have no idea what they do.

I’m reading a case on the elBulli restaurant for class, and one line reads, “So unique was the elBulli experience that many people who visited elBulli were sure to take pictures of each dish as they were served.”

Either that…or those customers were Asians.

Somehow, I’ve become the person that my friends go to for relationship advice. Over the last two months alone, I’ve had three separate friends talk to me for hours at a time about their issues. And it’s not one of those deals where they’re telling anyone and everyone their life problems (not that there’s anything wrong with that…), and I just happened to be one in a long line of relationship consultants. In fact, I’m pretty sure that I’m the first person each of them had a long, thoughtful, sit-down conversation with to discuss their situation. I’m not sure exactly why they’re coming to me - Am I viewed as trustworthy? Are people just comfortable talking to me? Am I a good listener? Do I ask the right questions? - but it happens rather frequently. Maybe I missed my calling in life…

It’s extremely ironic that I, of all people, am the first person some of my friends come to for advice when it comes to relationships. Suffice to say, the proof is most definitely not in the pudding.

I was leaving my friend Pussycats’ place when she asked, “Aren’t you taking the subway home?”
“No, I’m going to walk it.”
“Impressive.”

The distance to my place was two subway stops. A 15 minute walk, tops. Yet my reputation precedes me to the point where walking 15 minutes instead of taking the subway is considered impressive. That can’t be a good sign.

For the umpteenth day this school year, I stepped out of my condo building into the Toronto winter air and noticed that everyone was bundled up in winter jackets, scarves, tuques, and gloves as they scurried along the street. Meanwhile, I’m wearing my summer jacket. With a zipper that doesn’t zip. I had no gloves or scarves, and I discovered the other day that I didn’t even bother to bring a tuque to Toronto. These are the joys of being an Edmontonian fighting the Toronto “cold”.

Today was especially strange, as the temperature was barely below freezing and there was no reason for every person to be bundled up like they were ready for a trek to the Arctic Circle. However, it was snowing outside, and everybody in Toronto seems to associate snow with cold temperatures. Of course, the exact opposite is true - snow is actually a sign of relative warmth. I didn’t know the scientific reason for this until now - I just observed that every time it snowed in Edmonton for the past twenty years, it went from -25C to -20C in Edmonton.

And now you can claim that you learned something from my blog. Unless you’re from Edmonton, in which case you probably already knew this.

I just heard about “vajazzling” for the first time. In related news, I’m speechless.

I continued my tradition of hitting my building’s gym late at night this weekend. The gym in my building is located on the same floor as the movie and party rooms, so I pass by them on the way to the gym. When I reached the floor, I knew there was a party going on in one of the rooms because one of the party-goers was in the hallway in front of the door with a plastic beer cup in hand while she was talking on her cell phone. Fine. Whatever.

But when I left an hour later, I came into the hallway just as one of the off-duty concierge guys was going into another room on the floor with a girl he was holding hands with. I know this guy was off-duty because he doesn’t normally work weekends. So from what I could see, this off-duty concierge guy was using the building’s party room as a place to bring girls after going to a downtown club.

I’m not sure what my reaction should be - Shock? Outrage? Jealousy? Amusement? Awe? Admiration?

The greatest YouTube video of all time is now even better after I added some running commentary to the video. Does that make it the greatest-er YouTube video of all time now?

The story, if you haven’t heard it, is this - I was part of a group of ten guys that went down to Vegas a few years ago. One night, we all went out to dinner at one of Emeril’s restaurants. One of the choices available was a tasting menu that was a sampling of five or six items that came every fifteen minutes - it was a way to experience the different choices on the menu all in one sitting. An add-on was a wine tasting menu, which meant that between every course, a different glass of wine would arrive.

My buddy Lam ordered the sampling menu with the wine add-on. He’s also a complete lightweight. The result was so predictable that my buddy Hecto - yes, the same Hecto from the previous post - pulled out his camera and started recording because he wanted to catch what was about to happen on tape. That’s how predictable this was - this was his first take, and note the timing of the precise moment that Hecto asks Lam his question. The predictability of what happened is also why I cleared out of the area and was basically sitting on the lap of the guy beside me, as you’ll see from the video.